Posts Tagged ‘match’

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Is Online Dating a Boon or a Bust?

Saturday, March 7th, 2009

Online DatingClick, Find Love.

Is this a new movie or a title of a book focusing in love on the Internet? Think You’ve got mail, Must love dogs and Napoleon Dynamite, all films geared towards finding love or partners online. Have we really lost the era of romanticism?

While it is undeniable that a large number of people have found its way to online dating, it is certainly not regarded as a last recourse for those who have had a challenging time looking for dates. In fact, online dating is just like putting up a personal ad in a magazine or newspaper, a popular method in the late 80’s and early 90’s although online dating is much faster and more convenient.

What you get with online dating is the same as the personal ads in print, with so much more benefits and options. It’s still a blind chase but at least you get to check on it everyday, like tracking down how many people viewed your profile, you get instant messages in a matter of seconds and responses to messages are instantaneous.

While some have thanked their lucky stars for online dating, some sees this as a curse, fit for the preying for online wolves. Admittedly, a lot of shady persons have used the cloak of anonymity of the Internet to mask their true intentions. Profiles are not completely honest, old photos are uploaded and some even have the audacity to ask for money.

There have even been reports of some people from different countries meet up, some women lured into sex in promise of a new comfortable life and probably marriage. But to the credit of online dating, there have also been a lot of success stories involving a happy marriage or union.

Another known problems are with some online dating sites that have padded their member list with “bait” profiles, putting up more members to show that they have a vast membership. This would let a potential member think that there is a lot of people he or she can meet on the site and their chances of meeting a person they could probably like to get to know would grow higher.

But even with those mentioned problems, the popularity of online dating is rising at the speed and strength of a careening freight train at top speed. More and more websites have mushroomed and more people are signing up, sometimes even to more than two online dating sites.

The grasp of online dating sites extends to people who find the “chase” exciting and thrilling, the mystique of meeting a complete stranger adds up to the excitement.

There are also a good number of online dating aficionados that are relatively shy and would only be able to effectively communicate with other people behind the monitor using the keyboard as their mouthpiece.

Be it either for a short- or long-term relationship, online dating sites have already proven its effectivity and reliability with a startling ratio of success stories.

In fact, in 2004, US residents alone have spent $469.5 million in online dating sites, covering the fees. Online dating is now regarded as the largest industry in the paid website content.

There are now more than a thousand online dating sites, growing at en estimate of 35 percent increase each year. Shares in the market though are dominated by a couple of large websites which includes league giants Yahoo with Yahoo Personals, American Singles and Match.com to name a few.

But online dating is not only for us Americans, although we do dominate the market. The online dating bug has also bitten Europe with increased memberships seen and more and more European online dating sites popping up.

With the trend in growth going sky high, it wouldn’t be a wonder that five to ten years from know, a great number of married couple would attribute their meeting to online dating.

But unlike a romantic movie, not all person that you meet online is a prince just waiting to ride his white horse or a damsel in distress in a high tower just waiting to drop her hair for you to climb and live happily ever after.

Get to know a person thoroughly first and if possible, get him or her to show herself or himself through a webcam, then gradually go to talking through phones. Take it slow before agreeing to personally meet each other.

Click, Find Love – It might as well be the start of your own love story.

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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Posted in Blind Dates, Dating Courses, Dating Men, Dating Women, Online Dating | 4 Comments »

How to Prepare for Online Dating

Friday, March 6th, 2009

Fabulous great datesYou’ve been thinking about joining an online dating website but something is keeping you from pushing that JOIN button. Maybe you haven’t pushed that button yet because you haven’t prepared yourself. If so, then sit back and take a moment to see where you’re at with the whole concept of online dating. Dating, whether online or by traditional methods, is a huge step for many people, not just for those who are shy. Some people have never dated before. Others who are newly single may not have been part of the dating scene for many years. Others have had one bad experience after another and are trying to deal with issues of self-doubt or self-worth. Whether or not you see yourself in any of these examples, it’s important that you have an idea of what you want to get out of online dating. Knowing these answers will help you write a more effective profile and when your profile reflects your wants and needs, you won’t waste time on others who are looking for something entirely different. Are You Ready to Date Online? That’s the very first question you need to answer. If your heart and your head aren’t in this, then don’t start yet. You’ll waste your time as well as that of other members. And if the online dating site costs money to join, you’ll waste your money, too. Maybe you aren’t ready to ‘date’ but you are ready for companionship. That’s an important realization because you will likely find others online who are seeking companionship, too. The interesting thing about companionship, however, is that people differ in their definition of companionship. Dates with no strings attached and even casual one-night-stands are both definitions of ‘companionship’. So if you’re looking for a shoulder to cry on or someone to play Bingo with, make sure your intentions are clear. What Qualities Are You Seeking? Besides a particular eye and hair color, think about the qualities you are looking for in a mate. Here it’s important to think about more than physical attributes. Is your perfect soul mate someone who skis or surfs or who loves to putter in the garden? Can the person be recently divorced or widowed, or would you prefer someone new to the game of love? Is there a limit as to how old of a person you’re willing to date or how young for that matter? Should a mate share similar interests or will someone with differing interests better suit your needs? What are Your Online Dating Goals? Finally, ask yourself about your desired end results of your efforts. Are you looking for a long-term commitment that could ultimately lead to marriage? Do you seek friendship? Will a long-distance relationship be acceptable? Even though you answer all of the above questions, it doesn’t mean that your wants can’t change as you make your way through the online dating scene. These answers just give you a starting point. After all, your ultimate destination really is all about the journey!

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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Posted in Blind Dates, Dating Courses, Dating Men, Dating Women, Online Dating | No Comments »

How Online Dating Works

Friday, March 6th, 2009

Playing the NumbersYou’ve heard people talking about it. You’ve probably even seen advertisements for it on television. But for some reason, you haven’t yet given online dating a try. Perhaps you’re a bit nervous. Perhaps you don’t know a lot about computers and the Internet. Perhaps you’ll think less of yourself if you try and find companionship using technology rather than your personality. These concerns are understandable, but when you consider that millions of men and women are doing it every day, you’ve got to think that maybe online dating isn’t so bad. The way online dating works is really simple. You first need a way to connect to the Internet, which most people today already have so that should not be an issue. Then using the Internet, you need to find a suitable online dating website. Don’t let the word suitable scare you off. As you’ll see once you get into online dating, there are lots of different dating sites that cater to different groups or lifestyles. You’ll find sites for seniors, Christians, homosexuals, plain old heterosexual, and plenty more. Most of the online dating sites are subscription-based, meaning that you’ll have to join before you’ll be able to participate. Most often, it will cost money to join, but on some online dating websites, membership is free. The process of joining usually doesn’t involve much more than agreeing to the online dating site’s terms and conditions and paying the fee, if applicable. Once you’re a member, the next thing you’ll need to do is create a profile and a header. Your profile is what other members are going to read and based on your profile, another person should be able to determine whether you sound like someone worth pursuing. An effective profile not only describes you, it also talks about the qualities you’re looking for in someone else. Make it unique and be sure to proofread it before posting so you’re certain that what it says is really what you want to say. If the site allows members to attach photos to profiles, you’ll have to decide if this is something you’ll want to do. If so, just follow the instructions to attach it to your profile. Once your profile is posted, you can sit back and wait for others to start corresponding or you can start checking out other members’ profiles. If you find someone who sounds interesting, you can initiate the conversation. Besides corresponding via email and the ability to sort/delete your messages, online dating sites usually offer other activities you can participate in. Some sites offer live (typed) conversations via a site’s message board, and some sites host special events. Check both out and see whether those are activities you want to participate in. Online dating websites offer two really nice features. First, most are open around the clock so you can ‘date’ when it’s convenient for you. And second, new members join all the time so there will always be someone new to check out!

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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Posted in Blind Dates, Dating Men, Dating Women, Online Dating | No Comments »

What Women Want from a boyfriend in a relationship

Friday, February 27th, 2009

Dating Great MenThe first step to getting a great girlfriend is deciding exactly what kind of woman would be right for you. You don’t want to settle for a woman who isn’t someone you like being around for more than just a little while. The point of getting a girlfriend is to have someone to have more fun with. If you get into a relationship and end up miserable, you’re doing something wrong. So first, decide exactly what you want. That’s the only way you’ll stand a chance at getting it. How do you want to date? Do you want fun, casual, short-term relationships with several women at once? Would you rather have one girlfriend who you really have fun with and respect? Do you want to date a few women casually at first and see if you’d like to get more serious later? Who do you want to date? A friendly, down-to-earth girl-next-door? Someone outgoing and adventurous? An elegant and sophisticated woman? A quiet and reserved type who saves most of her attention for you? Or again, several different women so that you can see who you enjoy being around the most? What are you going to do together? Do you want someone to go with to all the local clubs? Would you rather have a girlfriend who sits on the sidelines and cheers for you, or one who will jump right in the game? How about a girlfriend who enjoys a sport or hobby you’ve never tried? It’s a good idea to start working this out now, before you meet her and before she announces that she’s bored with dinner and a movie every time you go out. Right now, you might think that physical attraction is all that a relationship requires, and you’d be right for the first date…maybe. But eventually, if you haven’t thought through what you want to give and receive in your relationship, your girlfriend will get on your nerves until you have to break it off. But if you start off your relationship right, you’ll be much more likely to get a great girlfriend who you’ll never want to leave. Remember that you have to have something to offer in a relationship, too. What will that be? There are a few things that women want that will surprise you, and others that will seem incredibly obvious. And then there are other things that you thought were important that turn out not to matter at all. So what’s fact and what’s fiction? This series will tell you after you figure out what it is that you really want out of your dating life.

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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What do You Want in Your Date?

Friday, February 27th, 2009

Great RelationshipThe first step to getting a great girlfriend is deciding exactly what kind of woman would be right for you. You don’t want to settle for a woman who isn’t someone you like being around for more than just a little while. The point of getting a girlfriend is to have someone to have more fun with. If you get into a relationship and end up miserable, you’re doing something wrong. So first, decide exactly what you want. That’s the only way you’ll stand a chance at getting it. How do you want to date? Do you want fun, casual, short-term relationships with several women at once? Would you rather have one girlfriend who you really have fun with and respect? Do you want to date a few women casually at first and see if you’d like to get more serious later? Who do you want to date? A friendly, down-to-earth girl-next-door? Someone outgoing and adventurous? An elegant and sophisticated woman? A quiet and reserved type who saves most of her attention for you? Or again, several different women so that you can see who you enjoy being around the most? What are you going to do together? Do you want someone to go with to all the local clubs? Would you rather have a girlfriend who sits on the sidelines and cheers for you, or one who will jump right in the game? How about a girlfriend who enjoys a sport or hobby you’ve never tried? It’s a good idea to start working this out now, before you meet her and before she announces that she’s bored with dinner and a movie every time you go out. Right now, you might think that physical attraction is all that a relationship requires, and you’d be right for the first date…maybe. But eventually, if you haven’t thought through what you want to give and receive in your relationship, your girlfriend will get on your nerves until you have to break it off. But if you start off your relationship right, you’ll be much more likely to get a great girlfriend who you’ll never want to leave. Remember that you have to have something to offer in a relationship, too. What will that be? There are a few things that women want that will surprise you, and others that will seem incredibly obvious. And then there are other things that you thought were important that turn out not to matter at all. So what’s fact and what’s fiction? This series will tell you after you figure out what it is that you really want out of your dating life.

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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Finding & Dating the Woman You Want

Friday, February 27th, 2009

What Men NeedJust as no woman wants a man who isn’t in control of his life, you don’t need a woman whose life is a disaster. If she has bad habits, addictions, or a history of decisions that turn out to make her life worse, pass her by. While you may like to feel needed, you don’t need to feel necessary for her survival in the everyday world. If she isn’t capable of taking care of herself, you don’t need to rescue her. Be nice to her, but don’t think you can cure her of an addiction or teach her how to handle her personal life better. That’s what counselors are for. Trying to take on that role in a romantic relationship just won’t work. If you find yourself attracted to a woman who just doesn’t have her life together, you need to date someone else. Later, when she decides on her own to straighten out her life, you might date her. But until then, don’t even try it. Remember, you want your relationships to be happy. If she can’t be happy because her life is a mess, you can’t make her happy and you can’t be happy with her. You can’t just come in and fix everything for her. That’s her job as an adult. Taking over that job will make her angry with you, no matter how much better your solutions are. Also, constantly having to rescue a woman gets old really quick, so don’t pick that relationship in the first place and you have a better chance of staying together. Hold out for a woman who has her life together. If she is healthy physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially, you’ll be able to tell. She’ll be happy, calm, and self-aware. She won’t have to escape reality with drugs or alcohol, or dull the pain in her life with self-destructive behavior. A woman you want to date will be able to take care of herself and she won’t be desperate for a man to come bail her out. A healthy woman won’t use you for security, because she already has her own. She’ll still want to be with you, but because she likes you, not because of what you can do for her. And she won’t drop you because someone better comes along. She won’t make excuses for dumb decisions and insist that she has no choice but to be a victim. She won’t have drama cluttering up her life which means that she’ll have room for a healthy, happy relationship with you. She’ll like you for YOU, and she’ll be much less likely to be clingy and jealous as well.

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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How to Meet & Keep a Great Girlfriend

Friday, February 27th, 2009

Activities for datingThere are women everywhere, but meeting one you’d like to go out with isn’t nearly as simple as it sounds. Women can be hard to approach, hard to impress, and hard to figure out – and no wonder. Their brains work differently than yours does. They relate to other people in a completely different way than you do. And sometimes, it seems they’re speaking another language, with the same words as yours, but completely different meanings. If you’ve had trouble navigating relationships before, now you know why. Few men really understand what women want, and the ones who do have an edge over the rest of the guys who just blunder along doing their best. For most men, getting a great girlfriend is hit-or-miss. If they try hard enough and long enough, there’s a possibility that they might get lucky. And then there’s the minority – the few men who just “get it”. Those men hardly have to try at all and they have women all over them. It just doesn’t seem fair. The good news? Those men aren’t really so different from you. They just know a few easy-to-learn techniques that make it simple to show women their best qualities. And if they can do it, so can you! You can learn how to get a girlfriend - and not just any girlfriend – a great one! You can learn how to approach women, impress them, and create excellent relationships with them. You can learn what to do, what to say, and how to behave in a way that makes you more powerful, more attractive, and more fun than ever before – and that is exactly what this series is going to teach you. You’re going to learn the pros and cons of several different types of relationships and how to choose the best relationship for you. You’ll find out where the best places to meet women are, and how to get the exact connection you want before you even approach a woman. Find out the impact having more fun has on your attractiveness. You’ll be learning how to catch a woman’s attention, how to tell if she’s interested, and how to make yourself more approachable – all without saying a word. Don’t kill your good impression with desperate pick-up lines or thoughtless mistakes. Learn better ways to flirt, to introduce yourself, and to make yourself memorable. Find out how to cast a wide net and then choose from great women who are interested in you. Whether you want to find a new relationship, you already have a specific woman in mind, you want to date several women or find one great relationship, this series shows you how to take control and make that happen.

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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Posted in 3, Dating Courses, Dating GURU, Life Coaching | No Comments »

What To Do If He Doesn’t Call

Friday, February 27th, 2009

Frustrated with datingYou had a fabulous time on the first date:  He was so easy to talk to that you felt like you had known him for years. He seemed to have your same tastes in food and movies, and you were amazed at how well you got along and look forward to the next date. If you’re honest, you felt such a connection to him that you told your best friend that you may have found your Mr. Right. Then the next day passes with no phone call. After a week, you stop checking voice mail, email or making excuses for him and accept that he’s not going to call you. How do you handle the rejection? You could head for the ice cream shop and drown your sorrows in scoops of rich ice cream with cookies and sprinkles on top. Hanging around the house in an old bathrobe crying is another way to deal with the hurt you feel. Drinking alcohol, driving too fast or getting angry and trash-talking about him are other destructive ways to cope with your sadness. So far that’s a look at how you might act in private or with friends, but eventually you might run into him again. If you work in the same company or even within the same industry, chances are you’ll see him again. If you met him through friends, then you can count on landing in the same social setting before long. How you handle yourself in that situation is going to be seen by others, so you need to think it over before it happens to avoid making a fool of yourself over a guy who doesn’t deserve your attention. Maybe you’ve imagined how you might “tell him off” – but is that what you really want to do? First of all, if he didn’t care enough about you to call after the date as he said he would, then he simply doesn’t care what you think. Telling him how you feel won’t change him because he has no interest in you. If you do that, you are the one who looks foolish in front of friends or co-workers. Or you might be fantasizing about “showing him what he missed” by parading a new date in front of the last one. Reality check: He won’t care and your new guy won’t like being used to cause jealousy in another man. You lose on both counts. The longer you obsess about him, the more you build up something that’s more than what it ever was. You can analyze your dating conversation a thousand ways so that you eventually hear something that wasn’t said and believe something that never happened. That’s the power of obsession – it turns reality into fantasy that you begin to believe. Don’t resort to high school dating tricks like sending him anonymous cards that are sweet or sarcastic. And definitely don’t drive by his house at all hours to see who is with him. You can’t win him over by stalking him, just be glad that he realized you two weren’t right for each other and move on to find the one who will treasure you most. In short, as one friend aptly expressed: If someone’s dishonored you, don’t let them live rent-free in your head. Move On!!!

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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Posted in Blind Dates, Dating Courses, Dating Men | No Comments »

How to Dress on Date Night

Friday, February 27th, 2009

First DateDressing for a date night says a lot about yourself and about how you perceive your date. It’s not that you have to be phony or dress differently, but you do have to dress appropriately for the plans he’s made for the date. Dressing for a date when you aren’t sure about the evening plan is like going to a job interview. You’ve certainly heard the advice, dress for the job you want, rather than the job you have. That means you dress up just a bit more. For a date, apply the same advice. If you aren’t sure what to wear, go with business casual and sensible shoes. If you wear a sleeveless top, bring along a hoodie or light sweater, since you don’t know whether you’ll be inside a chilly movie theatre or sitting outside at a patio restaurant after the evening temperatures drop. It’s a smart idea to ask your date what kind of evening he has planned. If he wants to keep it a surprise, then ask whether you need to dress as you would for the office, for a sports event or for an elegant party. That gives you a range for which to choose your outfit. How you dress says so much about who you are. If you go out in a halter top with cleavage barely contained and a mini-skirt that slightly larger than his handkerchief, then you’re sending a message that he reads as “Yes” and other women may be quick to label you as “easy”. You’ll get plenty of attention, but the wrong kind of attention. If you’re getting back into the dating scene after a few years, take time to look over the current magazines for casual styles. Then ask other women who have similar styles to yours what they would wear for a date. Basic rule of thumb: if you haven’t dated for five years or more, don’t wear what you use to wear on dates. Chances are you will telegraph your dating scene absence with a wardrobe that needs freshening up. You don’t have to buy all new clothes – just edit your outfits and add a bold item that’s current. A few quick words about age-appropriate dressing: Even if you’ve lost lots of weight and just got a facelift, don’t go shopping in the junior department after age 25. You’ll add to your age by trying to look too young. So if your pre-teen daughter loves the t-shirt dress, buy it for her and not for yourself. Even if your wardrobe basics do double duty for work and social wear, keep a few items reserved only for dates. That doesn’t mean something too suggestive or provocative. Instead, find a color-saturated sweater in a shade that makes your eyes sparkle and draws attention to your face or a wrap dress that shows your figure in tastefully sexy ways and wear those items for date night. Then you’ll start the evening feeling good in an outfit that makes you feel special even before he walks through the door!

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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The Stress of Dating

Friday, February 27th, 2009

Dating disastersDating may seem relaxing when experienced by individuals who feel trapped in their relationships, but for those dating, it’s often not relaxing, but quite stressful. There’s anxiety about what to talk about on the date, what to wear, how you are perceived, whether you’ll like the person romantically etc. Be natural and don’t feel you have to give a performance every time you get ready to go out for a date. Try to view your date as an adventure and not a chore. In addition, a single person often feels pressure from friends, co-workers and one’s parents to finally “settle down” and find “the one”. Sometimes you can feel dread when running into someone you know, anticipating the inevitable question about finding that special someone. You can simply let your friends and family know that you are in a dating phase for now and you’ll let them know if you meet someone that you feel has potential for a long-term relationship. Try to not put additional pressure on yourself to ensure each date measures up to a certain standard you may have in mind, but instead try to be “in the moment “and focus on getting to know your date. Don’t worry about whether the date will evolve into a long-term relationship, or be distracted by the desire to finally tell your friends and family you may have met the perfect person. Just let go of everything and simply experience your date. Listen carefully, try to enjoy yourself. If nothing else, you’ll develop better communication skills and practice the fine art of relaxing even though your life isn’t fully settled yet. A lot of people have difficulty feeling whole when they aren’t in a relationship and find it to be a challenge to feel comfortable with such an unresolved issue. Learning to stay centered and relax is a very good way to gain personal strength, gain confidence and balance, and be at peace despite the fact that external circumstances are not exactly how they want them to be.

 

Ó 2009 Prepare LLC and Anna Karimo. All Rights Reserved.

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